On being a Disabled American Veteran

Some twenty-odd years ago, I joined the Navy to see the world and get a college education. Mostly, I got to see a lot of Florida. But the point here is that during my service to my country, I injured my back on the job, which screwed up any plan of making the Navy a career. The good thing to come out of this was that college education now came free as part of my voc-rehab. The bad part would be I would find out how much the VA discriminated against women for the longest.

I was told upon discharge from the Navy that I should go directly to the Veteran's Affairs office and apply for that system. I did just that, getting an appointment for a C&P exam. I was also told that I wouldn't have to worry, the VA would up my disability rating, they always do.

Nothing could have been further from the truth. I went in for the evaluation, and the doctor there asked me questions such as "Are you married?" "Who does the laundry?" "Who does the shopping?" "Who does the housecleaning?" It appeared that if I was married, I had a husband TO TAKE CARE OF ME and therefore didn't need any compensation for an injury that usually gave a man a 100% rating. They "gave" me a 10% rating, patted me on the head and sent me on my way.

I did get into the VA hospital system; they could not deny me that because it was a service connected disablility. Twenty years ago, the way that the doctors handled someone who complained of pain was to give them enough drugs to make them a zombie, then they wouldn't squawk. I was given enough stuff to make me stupid, and I found I had little choice other than bear the pain of everyday living or take the drugs and forget about everything else. I chose not to take the drugs. I like to be able to find my ample backside with both hands.

After several years of no monthly compensation because I had drawn severance from the Navy, I found the Disabled American Veterans post, and joined. One of the local chapter members had been a National Service Officer at one point, and he kindly showed me the ropes of reapplying for increased benefits. (Even though it was painfully obvious that the old boys' club that was the DAV would rather have me sitting out with "the little women" of the Auxillary.)

My benefits increased to 40% with no problem, and the doctor who interviewed me this time was appalled to hear what the first doctor had said. But not appalled enough to raise my benefits above the 50% mark, which makes a huge difference in your standing in the VA pecking order.

A couple of years later, I went through the evaluation again, this time pulling 60%. I would have been very happy had I not known that one of the fellow vets from my post had just been awarded 100% for the very same injury I have. One the way home from the evals, he was bragging about the new boat he had just gotten, and how he really had put one over on the VA finally. I was fairly steamed.

The point of telling all this, I suppose, is to point out how the odds can get stacked against a person who is trying to get benefits. Just being female kept me from getting the same as someone else.

Today I drive a car with disabled plates bordered by a "DAV Life Member" frame. I still get countless dirty looks when I get out of my car, and people assume nothing is wrong because I don't use a chair. (Or they assume that my husband is the disabled vet. Funny now, because I don't have a husband any more.) They have no idea what kind of pain I deal with when I go shop for necessities. If I didn't have the plates, I would avoid places with large parking lots, because it would be all I could do to get into the store, much less spend a great deal of time shopping. As it is, I am dragging at the end of a grocery shopping trip. I hate it. But I am ABLE to deal with it because I did get the plates. (P.S. I never park in the "van" spaces. That just wouldn't be right.)

All is not bad, however. I would like to say that overall, the care I have received from the VA is very good. It's much better now that I have a 60% rating that makes me eligible for prescriptions without copay. Services for women veterans are also much more available. But I do see a lot of things evaporating as the government pulls money away from the VA healthcare system to pay for other budget shortfalls. That's no way to treat those who gave of themselves in service to the nation.

Thank you for reading.

Gettin' there

The characters are beginning to spring to life! Pyrus is pretty much done save for a few details, and I have the hair done on all of them. I don't have the beard done on Gunther yet. I may have to take a couple of test runs at that to determine how to do the best stubbly beard.

Once I get all the figure work done, I will cut away the layer of batting that I'm working on top of now, leaving batting only under the figures. The side panels will be squared up and placed with the main panel. The whole top will then be sandwiched with another layer of batting, and the backing. The background will be quilted, and we are thinking about leaves or possibly a castle turret. Woohoo!
This isn't photographed on a flat surface, so a bit of distortion is resulting. It will all make good sense when I get it flat on a wall and get a good overall shot.

Gunther looks odd with no beard! ; ) The belt buckle is a real one, and the belt is a 3D added piece. There will also be one on the archer chick; you can see that above Gunther's shoulder, where it hasn't been sewn in yet.

Flame on!

That refers to Pyrus' hair. Not a lot to report today, even though progress was made. I found out what NOT to do the next time I attempt this type of project...I will NOT use a fusible bonding agent underneath the applique pieces for this type of work where I am doing freemotion embroidery over the applique. I've found it gums up the needle and causes the thread to fray horribly.

I'm using Metafil size 80/12 needles, and Sulky rayon embroidery thread. The fabrics are all 100% cotton, some from Red Rooster fabrics, and some hand-dyed. This is what I've used on all my other embroidery projects, and it has to be the fusible that is causing the grief. I normally do almost all of the freemotion embroidery without any applique, but the size of this piece (51 inches square) would make it impractical.

I did finish the second Celtic knotwork panel, so that intricate stuff will not be making me crazy at the last minute. I hope. I'm sure that something will go awry, and make me sweat bullets before this is over. Ah, but that's half the fun!

Keeping odd hours

That's really nothing new for me. It's 5 am, and I've been up all night doing the Celtic knot border for the quilt. This was fun, but quite the challenge. To keep me entertained while I worked, I put on a couple of movies. First I watched Sneakers, which always makes me think about the fact that Frank Miller modeled his version of Matt Murdock after a young Robert Redford. After watching that, and the "making of" portion of the dvd which I had not seen before. I put on the director's cut of Daredevil, which I haven't watched for at least THREE months! Travesty! Yeah, it's as good as I remembered ; )

Here's a close up of the knotwork. In the far off view, the purple part doesn't show up much. I may have to use some contrast thread in the quilting to make it show better. There's way too much work there for it to not show.

I just spoke on Yahoo Messenger with Wonder Alice. She has had a migraine today, and so did I earlier. I slept most of the day trying to get rid of it, and didn't wake up again until almost 10 pm. It was down to a dull roar, so I was able to get work done on the quilt again. There wasn't enough on the main part that I accomplished to even document. But it's progressing nicely, and I work well under a deadline.

Shaping up

Not me! The quilt project! As you can gather here, things are looking up. I found some sparkly things today to use to add to the wizard's wand, and a good rough leather-looking fabric for Gunther's boots.

This is the part where I look at the project and know it will all come together, but I know other people really aren't feeling it yet...




This is most of the applique cutting, and the next step will be to start the thread painting details. That's the fun part, when the figures take on dimensions and the various textures start to show. I should have the faces all done tomorrow.

More Work in Progress

This is how we build a quilt...

Step one: Trash through the extensive fabric stash for that one piece that is PERFECT for Pyrus' hair, Gunther's boots, or the archer's outfit. The inner sanctum of the domestic goddess will remain in total chaos until the project is finished.

Who wants to clean up when you are in manic creative mode? Not me.

The pattern is traced onto a fusible webbing, placed on the back of the specific fabric, and cut out. K got introduced tonight to the joys of pinning patterns to fabric.

This is Gunther's hair and his collar to his cape. On the white sheet behind are random pieces of his armour waiting to be cut out.

This is the elven(sp?) archer's face and headpiece.

We will be working this piece from the background to the foreground.

The pieces are assembled and pressed onto the background fabric with a small Clover iron. I have to wear white gloves when I work with fabric. A few years ago, I developed the occupational hazard of dye allergies. My hands crack open and bleed when I handle fabric if I don't wear these lovely designer gloves with the fingertips cut off.

Details will be added when the stitching begins. All the facial features and garment details will be done in free motion machine embroidery.

We had to quit at midnight. K has to go back to her real job, and I have to go to Memphis to the VA for an eye exam. I do hope it doesn't take all day.

Work in progress

Sometimes what seems should be the easy part of a project isn't. Once you settle on a design, picking fabric can be quite the challenge, especially if you are working out of your current stash rather than going out and buying from scratch.

I think I have pulled through every piece of fabric I own, and friends, let me tell you, I could stock a small store with what I have in the collection. Nearly twenty years of serious fabric collecting, and I haven't even bought any in the past couple of years.

What you see here is the background fabrics that I have decided on for the Shining Armor project. The mossy green will be the major part, and the wheat print will be the background behind the Celtic knotwork pattern I've put together for the flanking panels. I've chosen fabrics for the characters' clothes, hair, skin tone, and the binding. There most certainly will be things that I will decide won't work, once I'm started sewing, but I have to make hay whether the sun shines or not in the next week. Photos of the completed 51" square quilt must be in by May 1, 2006.

Here is the full scale pattern for the Celtic knotwork border. It measures 7 inches wide by 49 inches long, and will run vertically on either side of the main characters. It will be woven of 1/4 inch wide bias tubing, in purple and a steely blue.

The reason for the red at the top? I forgot to change out the divider sheet in the printer and why waste a good print when it doesn't matter? These will be made by putting a piece of waxed paper over the pattern and weaving the knots, dabbing a bit of fabric glue at the intersections to hold everything together. When that is done, I will gently slide them onto the background fabric, pin and glue them in place, and stitch them down. Or that's the plan right now. 8 )

The goal for tomorrow is to get some of the first parts of the characters worked onto the mossy background. I will be appliqueing the fabrics onto the background, adding the precise details with machine freeform embroidery. Most of the threads have already been chosen, too, so what is left is to get rolling on this bad boy, and do it up right. Stay tuned.

Serendipity

Easter Sunday has come once more, and I was privileged enough to get to spend it with my mother. I got up this morning and prepared one of her favorite meals, chicken and dumplings (the puffy kind, not the flat rolled ones) and took it out to her at the nursing home. I had arranged yesterday for the ex to meet me there, because my mother had asked about him. He has always been good to her, and went above and beyond the call of duty when she was living in our home. My mother was quite surprised when he walked in her room, and cried when he hugged her. I think this is probably the first time in almost two years she has seen him, because of our breakup.

Mama and Mrs. Harris, her roommate, were very pleased with the dumplings, and made quick work of them. We went out to the front parlor area, and sat with my mother and talked a little and watched a couple of old comedies on TV Land. It was a pleasant day, and afterwards, the ex and I did a quick run through at Big Lots for some groceries. He hates to shop, and for some reason lately, has been asking me to accompany him. Odd, since he would never go with me before.

The high pollen count is still giving me a terrible time, so I downed some antihistamines and went to lie down for a while. I must have been tired, as I slept until almost 8 pm. I checked email, talked briefly with a couple of online friends, and cruised by a couple of blogs. As I was getting ready to sign into this blog to make an entry, I saw on the scrolling blogs that were being updated "wonder alice". Of course, that got me curious. Down the rabbithole that is the internet I went.

By extreme coincidence, wonder alice is also going through the problems of macular degeneration, but the wet form, which is so much more devastating than what I've been through up to this point with the dry form. She lives in Japan, and by reading her blog, I got the pleasure of seeing many views of the sakuras, something I only got to do once, and it was in Washington, D.C. instead of Japan. Still a beautiful memory for me.

Through her excellent photo blogging, wonder alice has rekindled my desire for some of the wonderful Asian cuisine that I sampled during my tour of duty on Okinawa. She also has something else in common with me...a love of floral design. Even though I no longer do it on a regular basis, the skills come in handy on occasion. Just the other day, when rearranging a lot of things in my flat, I came across several of my ikebana containers and the heavy pin frogs I bought off the base in Kadena and Naha. I must try my hand at this again. It does wonders for your soul to work with nature's beauty.

I have a lot to do this coming week, and I hope I can get it all done. So, if you don't see me around quite as much, it's because I'm concentrating in the inner sanctum of the domestic goddess, aka the sewing room.

The Ides of April

I've never been one to jump on a bandwagon, mostly because I couldn't catch it. If I did catch it, I'd have to have someone give me a hand to hoist me up there. So, what am I doing here, adding my blog to Blogging Against Disablism Day on May 1?

Maybe I will come up with something insightful by then. I hope so. Right this moment, it is 0416 and I am rather fried after a long day of helping celebrate my mother's eighty-sixth birthday, and doing a few other things important only to myself.

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I would like to say that I do not think Tiger Woods would have intentionally used the "s-word" had he known the connotations it has outside the US. I know it was a phrase that I have heard and probably used over the years without having any clue it was considered bad taste in other places. It's another case of two countries being separated by that common language again. Here in the good old U S of A, a bum is a guy who is too lazy to work for a living. Until recently, when a friend sent me a great dictionary of American/British terms, I didn't know it could be a part of your anatomy. Ah, semantics.