New Bed: Part Deux

Uncertainty as Toby sniffs the new bed. >>>
Ringo prepares to dive underneath.
~~~~~

It's taken two weeks for the furniture store to get my actual new bed. They had the mattress set in stock, and I have been sleeping (!) on it with it perched on a loaner frame.

There was a repeat performance with the cats. The doorbell rang. The cats skittered under the bed. The delivery men went in the bedroom to lift up the mattresses to retrieve the frame and cats went flying out. Oh shit, she's moving again.

I watched with great anticipation as first the headboard and then the footboard came through the front door. Then suddenly, the thought struck me that this was the first time in my entire life I had ever bought a NEW bed. My childhood bed was one of a pair of bunks left over from my older brothers, my teenaged bed was bought at a yard sale, and I had to strip layers of paint off it to finally repaint it an antiqued avocado (it was the 60's, after all). I took that bed with me to my marriage, and it was not replaced until I inherited Great Auntie's furniture. It was a good thing that at the time I was married to a very short man.

During my second marriage, we never had a real bed, just the mattress set on a frame. Toward the end, we did buy a headboard, but it never even got attached to that frame. By that time, I was sleeping in the other room in Great Auntie's bed anyway. So, that one doesn't count in my book. As far as I know, the headboard is still leaning against the wall.

Back to our story...this bed had to be assembled, as it had side rails and screwed in slats. The men put the platform back on the bed, I tossed on my new dust ruffle (the cats love that), they topped it off with the mattress, and they were on their way. The cats were still well hidden. I put on the sheets, tossed on the quilt, fluffed up the pillows, and still no cats. Hmm.

I flopped into the middle of the bed. Man, this is one tall bed. I can barely vault into it. I can't sit on the edge and put on my shoes, which is good anyway, because that ruins your bed eventually. There is a chair in the bedroom for that. Which now is uncluttered because I put a rack to hang my jackets and things up on the wall. What has come over me? I look semi-organised in there. Maybe it will spread to the rest of the house some day.

Eventually, the cats showed up from the undisclosed hiding place. The jaguar slink mode was employed once again, and both cats had to sniff the new furniture to see if it met to expectations. Once satisfied, they dived under the bed ruffle to check out the clearance beneath.

Then I pulled back the covers and dived in myself. Four hours later, I woke up because some fool thought he had dialed the contest line for the local radio station. I stumbled into the living room, as I don't keep the phone near the bed lest I answer before I fully awaken. No glasses, so no chance of reading the caller ID. This poor soul asks me "Am I the third caller?" On another, less wonderful day, he would have gotten the wrath of Khan. But I was nice, saying that he must have the wrong number, and please dial more carefully next time. He apologized. I hung up the phone.

I need to make up a snappy retort for this sort of call, because three hours later, it happened again. This time, the lady insisted she had dialed the number they gave on the radio. Impossible, I said, I've had this number for over ten years. She still argued, and I hung up on her. Next person is going to win an all expenses paid trip to the local landfill if they don't apologise for misdialing.

~~~~

Short story long: I love my new bed. I am the queen of the household. You may kiss my ring.